Imperfect Coffee & Quiet Times

I can never quite have the perfect quiet time with God. I crave sipping a warm, cream filled cup of coffee as the sun rises and basking in the glory of God’s Word with serenity circling around me. Instead, the adorable dog begs for my attention, my phone presses the doorbell of my mind with text notifications, my to-do list seems to jump out of every page of Scripture and before I know it – I’ve only taken one swig of sweet delicious coffee, and it now tastes like cold chalky leftovers. Moment ruined. And I wonder –

God how can I find You in the midst of my messy, loud, imperfect life?

A large crowd was following and pressing against Him. A woman suffering from bleeding for 12 years had endured much under many doctors. She had spent everything she had and was not helped at all. On the contrary, she became worse. Having heard about Jesus, she came behind Him in the crowd and touched His robe.  For she said, “If I can just touch His robes, I’ll be made well!” Instantly her flow of blood ceased, and she sensed in her body that she was cured of her affliction.

At once Jesus realized in Himself that power had gone out from Him. He turned around in the crowd and said, “Who touched My robes?”

His disciples said to Him, “You see the crowd pressing against You, and You say, ‘Who touched Me?’”

So He was looking around to see who had done this. Then the woman, knowing what had happened to her, came with fear and trembling, fell down before Him, and told Him the whole truth. “Daughter,” He said to her, “your faith has made you well. Go in peace and be free from your affliction.” –Mark 5:24-34

And You show me the answer:

I simply show up.

I press in.

I reach for You… and You meet me way more than half way. You see through the chaos, and You find me. When I look at my imperfect cup of coffee, my messy life, I pray that you would remind me to stare into Beer Lahai Roi  – The well of the Living One who sees me. You see me. Thank you Lord, for desiring to know me. I confess that I often just want your miracles – purpose, peace, perfection, answered prayers – but You want to meet me, you want a lasting, deeper relationship that isn’t based on niceties or superficialities. The craziness around me does not deter You, my sin did not repel You, my imperfections do not disappoint You. Instead, they entice You- as it is Your M.O. to show kindness while Your well-deserved wrath hangs damned behind a blood-soaked cross so that sinners like me can be redeemed. This is knowledge too wonderful for me to comprehend.

Quiet my soul,

be still,

sit before the

steadfast immovable throne of God,

the everlasting King. He will not be moved. His kingdom will not be

shaken. In Him I put my hope. In Him, I believe.

Be still, quiet and reverent before God. He

heals, He

forgives, He

loves. Oh my

soul,

sing praises.